Being Inspired Vs. Jealousy…And How To Stay On Your Path

Written by guest contributor, Devyn Rush.

I played a game with three young girls a few weeks ago, where I took a bunch of blocks and made three separate "paths" with the blocks. I then asked the girls to go from where they were, to the end of the path. I had them hopping and skipping blocks, and figuring out how to get from one block to the next on their own. Each path was different, so in order to jump from one block to the next, each of them would have to come up with her own individual way to do it. The youngest girl kept watching the older girls, so I stopped and said, "It isn't going to help to watch their paths! You have to figure out how to get to the end all on your own. Watching them isn't going to help you get to where you have to go!"

And then I realized I was being a hypocrite.

Image courtesy of "photosteve101"

There is a lot of inspiration around us. And if you're open to all of the amazing things in life, then you're most likely going to be inspired by everything and everyone in some way. So what's the difference between being inspired... And losing your own path? I recently read an article by Bob Lefsetz. He's a great writer with a LOT of opinions, many of which I agree with - Many of which I get frustrated by... Because I agree with them 🙂 Anyway, Bob wrote about a musician we should all follow. He wrote that she is "the queen" when it comes to this particular topic he was writing about. I immediately felt inspired... And competitive... And maybe a little jealous. And then I stopped. And I realized that she and I have two separate lives! What works for her could totally work for me... Or it might not, because we have 2 separate lives!

Jealousy doesn't work. Inspiration does.

Photo courtesy of Cornelia Kopp

As women, we tend to compete with each other. Who's the prettiest? Who has the best spouse? The best job? The best purse? Who is the most admired? We've all heard about "healthy competition". This is what I've concluded:

There are 2 major causes of competitiveness: Inspiration... And Jealousy.

HEALTHY competition stems from a root of inspiration... "Check her out! She is a beautiful, confident, radiant woman. I'm proud to see someone like that, who has created a life of love and abundance for herself. I think we would get along great. I'm going to ask her out for coffee, and maybe I can learn a few things, simply by being around her and asking questions"

Image courtesy of Graham Crumb


UNHEALTHY competition stems from a root of jealousy... "Well look at her. She must think she's so hot. That glow she has is probably just a tan from a tube, and watch while she tries to walk in those heels! She has to lean on her perfect boyfriend just so she can walk in those things!"

Sound familiar... At all? It really goes back to bullying. Teaching young girls to choose the first approach will help them to make much wiser, healthier, and more productive decisions in life. The first option helps a woman move forward in her life. The second option... Makes a women feel terrible about herself and gets her off of her own path and onto someone else's. And then, when that "perfect" woman "wins", the jealous one will feel like she was stepped on with those "perfect" heels.

What choice do you want to make?

Today, I am committing to converting any Â initial Â feelings of jealousy that I have, into feelings of inspiration. I am committing to recognizing that I love the path I'm on, and staying on it will be way more productive than jumping onto someone else's... Which is essentially what we do when we get jealous. Rhonda Byrne, author of The Secret, says that jealousy is sending it out to the universe, that there isn't enough to go around.

So find your path and stay on it. And when road blocks come, get inspired. Take inspired action, rather than frantic pursuits of happiness that will amount to nothing but frustration and a feeling that you're not good enough.

You are more than good enough.



Devyn Rush, best known as “The Singing Waitress” on Season 10 of American Idol, has been singing for as long as she could talk. Having grown up in a very musical family and originating the role of Anna in Spring Awakening at Lincoln Center and understudying off-Broadway at the Atlantic Theatre, Devyn decided to move to New York City immediately after graduating high school. Now a singer/songwriter and certified to teach yoga, Devyn is passionate about child advocacy, especially in the areas of bully prevention. Rush is now a national spokesperson for the bully prevention organization *Hey U.G.L.Y.* (Unique.Gifted.Lovable.You.), through which she performs at schools and combines songwriting with yoga to build emotional awareness and self-love in children. Her debut EP, Time, is now available on iTunes.

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