iCare: Let’s Stop Hiding Behind Our Technology And Have A Real Connection This Valentine’s Day

With Valentines Day right around the corner I can’t help but think about this thing called love. Or, at the very least “care”, as so many of us seem to have become immune to it.

Now, before you start ranting to me about how that isn’t true let’s look at how we as a society show that we care. First, let’s look at the way most of us communicate, using our phones.


Texting has become the most popular way of communicating for people ages 18-45. According to Mail Online Magazine people on average make, receive or avoid 22 phone calls per day. We send 23 text messages and check our smart phones on average 150 times per day! If those people range between 18-25 expect that number to triple.

While texting information can get truly lost in translation, I think every teenage girl and some grown woman can agree that texting has become slightly more understandable since Emogi’s were created. Interpreting anything sent from a phone can lead to disaster, so now at least we have a little smiley face blowing a heart or a monkey covering his eyes to help decipher. I’ve avoided real misunderstandings just by sending the banana. But, sending texts has replaced the sound of a real voice, something as humans we need to hear to understand how someone actually feels about us. We need to listen to the sound of someone’s voice to determine if we like, dislike them or even fear them. It’s a real sense and lately we’ve lost it.



Secondly, let’s look at what happens when two people actually do have a real conversation using their voice on the phone or in person. When placed in a real voice on voice conversation, in a real environment other than cyberspace, with other real people around, neither party knows what to say or how to say it. We’ve all become a little socially awkward.

Facebook and Twitter isn’t any better and yet we communicate daily using them as a platform. We continue to place only the best highlights of our lives for all of our high school alumni and ex’s to see. But, as we do this it only helps to create an even thicker shell to hide in. When people ask how you are will you direct them to your Twitter feed or your latest status update? We’ve become more comfortable checking in with our friends posts than checking in with them.

When people find it harder and harder to connect on a simple social level and continue to keep people at arms length, how will we ever become vulnerable and open to love when our fear of being exposed, rejected or merely found out dangles in the balance? How do we learn to say, I care?

Created and designed by Jonathan Ady. www.studioeighty.com

Created and designed by Jonathan Ady. www.studioeighty.com

  Like little kittens we have to learn to trust–in ourselves–and in others. Trust doesn’t come overnight. Trust takes time, consistency, and proving that you are who you say you are. It’s about being that person in every situation everyday. It means truly caring about someone’s ambitions, interests, and about them when it has nothing to do with you. This might sound obvious, but I think we could all use a reminder in the age of entitlement. Actions always speak louder than words.

It takes real strength to let your guard down and even though that has become increasingly harder these days, I believe deep down all anyone really wants is to do is just that. People will get wrapped up in their own hype, their image, their fear and purposely keep themselves distant but instead, be brave. Stare fear in the eyes and tell someone you love them.

  So, what if we all just let go and gave in this Valentines Day? What if we took a leap of faith and said, yes? What if we all took the mask off, the veil, the Louboutin's and were just us? Maybe if we showed a real smile rather than an Emogi we’d find out we’re not too far off from making a real connection.

Originally published on  SocioButterfly.com